X-Men 154: Pee-ew! nion

Get it? Because this reunion totally stinks! haha

WHAT WE LEARNED THIS ISSUE:

STORM AND CYCLOPS PLAY CALVIN BALL IN THE DANGER ROOM.

XAVIER LIKES TO LOOK ALL ADVENTURE-Y IN HIS INDIANA JONES HAT AND WHEELCHAIR. WHAT NO WHIP?

WOLVERINE DOES NOT LIKE HIS TENDER MOMENTS WITH MS MARVEL INTERRUPTED BY IMPUDENT GIRLS: "BLAST! WHAT IS IT, KITTY? THAT WAS THE WRONG WALL TA PHASE THROUGH AN' THE WRONG TIME TA DO IT." COCKBLOCKING INTANGIBLE WALL PHASING TEENAGER!!!

COSAIR THE STARJAMMER PASSES BY THE VOYAGER 2 SATELLITE, WHICH IS DUE TO ORBIT URANUS BY 1986, IN HIS SPACESHIP. OH NEAT, GREAT STORY, NERD!!!!!!

COSAIR CRASHES INTO THE X-MANSION AND REUNITE WITH HIS WIENER KID CYCLOPS. THEY FIGHT SOME ALIENS WITH STORM AND LEVEL THE X-MANSION (HAS THAT HAPPENED YET? BECAUSE IT SEEMS TO HAPPEN ALL THE GOD DAMN TIME).

Wow it's been a whole fuggin month but here I am again, blogging my nards off about the motherfucking X-Mens. This one's got some decent action and is about to ramp up the space opera. See, you'd think Cyclops being an orphan would make his back story simple. A shy, reserved loner, self reliant on account of growing up with no parents. AAHHHNN. WRONG. Cyclops' dad is actually the notorious space pirate Cosair, who was abducted by aliens along with his wife right after he pushed his two kids out the side the airplane he was flying that was about to crash. Cyclops' mom was brutally murdered but the dad escaped alien enslavement and rounded up some other random space aliens to form a motley crew of pirates known queerly as the Starjammers.

Anyway, not all that important right now. More just the part about Cyclops reuniting with his dad for the first time (well second time, but this time he's actually made aware that it's his dad) and we're about to spend a bunch of issues dicking around up in space with the X-Bags; favorite alien bird people, the Shi'ar. Fucking great.

You know I never really liked the whole space angle, at least when you involve Earth, because the nearest star is 500 light years away, and the nearest galaxy WAY further, which means that it's PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO INTERACT WITH ALIENS IN ANY MEANINGFUL WAY. But that's just the super dork in me. Also Cockrum's art still kind of blows.

So next issue: more spacemen and aliens and spacefights and all that silly space shit up in space.