X-MEN 258: BRO CAN CHANGE

I'M ON A TIGHT SCHEDULE SO HERE'S THE SHORT, SHORT VERSION:THE MANDARIN PUSSES OUT AND THE X-MEN WIN. PSYLOCKE IS NOW AN ASIAN NINJA, WOLVERINE IS STILL CRAZY, AND JUBILEE IS WITH THEM ON A BOAT.

 

A FUCKING BOAT MOTHERFUCKER.

 

I PUT JORDAN BURROUGHS ON THE COVER BECAUSE HE IS A CHAMPION FROM NEW JERSEY WITH 'ERNEST' FOR A MIDDLE NAME, JUST LIKE ME. EXCEPT INSTEAD OF HAVING ALL THE X-MEN COMICS, BURROUGHS IS AN OLYMPIC GOLD MEDALISTS. PRACTICALLY THE SAME THING, REALLY.

WOLVERINE NEEDS TO CONCENTRATE SO HE CAN TEAR OFF A REALLY SATISFYING FART. FRRRRRRRT!

JUBILEE IS LIKE 14 YEARS OLD BUT SHE MAKES THESE PROFESSIONAL NINJAS LOOK LIKE DOG SHIT. OH WELL, SHE IS A FUCKING SUPER HERO I GUESS.

THIS PANEL IS REALLY CREEPY.

BREAK DANCE FIGHTING! HAHA, ZOOLANDER, STILL FUNNY!

SMOOTH BELCHES! ALSO FUNNY! FOREVER!

COMIC RELIEF! NICE ONE CLAREMONT AND LEE! 

HAHA YEAH OKAY WHATEVER PSYCLOKE. SHUT UP.

ALL THE NINJAS JUST SHIT THEMSELVES! WOLVERINE IS TO NINJAS AS CHRISTIANS ARE TO LIONS!

 PSYLOCKE STRIKES WITH HER 'ATTACK VAGINA'!

HAHA, THE BURTON BATMAN MOVIES WERE DUMB. FUN TO WATCH BUT TOTALLY FUCKING STUPID.

ALSO WOLVERINE LOVES THAT TWO CLAWS ON EITHER SIDE OF THE NECK 'DONT MAKE ME POP MY MIDDLE CLAW, BUB' MOVE SO MUCH.

THE X-MEN WIN AND ARE ON A BOAT. THE END.

A fun 3 part series that established the Psylocke, Wolverine, Jubilee trio that will be a mini group for a while. Still have no idea why they turned Psylocke into an Asian ninja. IT IS NEVER EXPLAINED. She just washed up on the shore that way after going through the Siege Perilous. Hah. OK COMIC BOOKS, IF YOU SAY SO.

And Jim Lee is now a legendary master. Also signals the end of the Bronze age and start of the 'Modern' Age or whatever the fuck the 90's and early 00s in comics history are called. Either way, its the age in which I bought a mega fuck load of comics. So hooray for that.

OK, gotta run!