What we learn this issue besides that Wolverine is a little gassy lately. Probably from that nasty chili he ate, which is most likely what made him blow up that toilet so bad that it looked like a god damned holocaust.
SEE, EVEN WOLVIE SAYS IT WAS PROLLY THE CHILI WHAT DID IT.
ACTUALLY WHAT HAPPENED IS THE X-MEN ARE ALL FUCKED UP AND WOLVERINE IS GOING OUT HUNTING IN THE MORLOCK TUNNELS SOLO. HE'S RIDIN SOLO, HIS TIE'S A BOLO, HIS CUP'S A SOLO
KITTY PRYDE IS STUCK IN HER PHASING GHOST FORM BUT SHE CAN STILL GIVE COLOSSUS A BONER.
STORM CAN'T HANDLE THE PRESSURE OF BEING THE LEADER OF THE X-MEN WHILE SO MANY MUTANTS ARE SLAUGHTERED AND HER MIND POPS LIKE A ZIT.
UGLY LESBIAN MUTANT CALLISTO HAS TO BEAT SOME SENSE INTO HER.
THEIR FIGHT IS MIRRORED BY SABRETOOTH AND WOLVERINE'S FIRST FIGHT SCENE IN THE PAGES OF A COMIC BOOK.
BOTH OF THEM LOOK READY TO RRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUMBEEEEEEEEEEELLL!
The X-Mean are all fucked the fuck up but Wolverine still has enough gas left in the tank to rip some solid farts and to have a tumble with Savorytoof. They slash each other up but Savortoot is clearly bigger and stronger and likeS murder more so Wolvee just runs away, or "rabbits" as Claremont would say.
Psylocke is also introduced to the X-Males for the first time, at least in Uncandy Eggsmen. I think Claremont just read about her in Marvel UK's Captain Britain comics and was like, OK PURPLE HAIRED TELEPATH YOU ARE MINE NOW. YOU BELONG TO ME.
You know why so many super heroines have crazy colored hair? Like Polaris' green hair and Jean Grey's red hair and now Psylocke's purple hair? Because then the artists dont have to work so hard to distinguish the characters by drawing, the colorist will just mark them with their hair. Which is why Cyclops and Iceman look like twins when they're in civilian clothes. Call it the "South Park effect" if you want to get cute with it AND WHY NOT GET FUCKING CUTE WITH IT?
Anyway, the issue also owns because of the fight of claws and shit and because there are just dead bodies piled up everywhere. Fucking corpses strewn about the sewers of New York. MUTANT CORPSES all laying around like fucking garbage.
And Rick Leonardi did the art and it is excellent. NEXT ISSUE: MORE FUR WILL FLY AS WOLVERINE AND SABRETOOTH POKE MORE HOLES IN EACH OTHER. AND THEN FUCK THOSE HOLES THAT THEY JUST POKED. HAHA NO THEY DON'T THAT WOULD BE FUCKING SICK. EW, GROSS.
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